a planet (or a star)

i don’t want to be

someone’s whole life

again

i cannot

there is nothing like

codependency

to breed resentment

between two people

with the potential to be

so much more

than each other’s

only dream

i don’t want to be someone’s

whole life

but the transition from

sun to star

is never smooth

and i’d grown used to being

needed

by someone with no goals

other than keeping me

around

so of course it feels like

neglect

when truly it’s just

healthy distance

i don’t want to be

someone’s whole life

not again

so i write poetry

and crochet

i plan trips and

brainstorm businesses

i listen to music and

try

not to constantly think

of you

i know it’s just a habit

i picked up from a

year

of 8 hour phone calls

and minutely texts

i know there’s more

i can be doing

so i go to work

and read every book

in my house

and try not to smile

too hard

when a character reminds me

of you

i don’t want to be someone’s whole

life

but i like the feeling

of being

someone’s world

and perhaps i need to

find comfort

in simply being a

planet

in your solar system

still important

but not necessary

still adored

but not worshipped

loved by choice

not by lack

of imagination